I LOVE MY NIKON D3000!

Chiquito, You've brought out a side of me I thought I lost but it all came rushing back. ;-) This is so exciting! I feel like a kid again!

Sorry that I wouldn't share my new toy this weekend... you know I love you I love you I love you!!!!!!

Thank you so much for my gift!

MAR

A new perspective

Its so important to nourish our bodies and our souls properly. Lately, I haven't been feeling good about myself. Physically my body doesn't feel the same or look the same. I have lumps and bumps in the wrong places, my skin doesn't glow the same, I'm tired and cranky all the time. I know that I need to eat, drink, and take care of my body with more conviction. How can I be so passionate about public health and succumb myself to these dreadful eating habits? ewwww. I'm disgusted. So I vow to change the way I eat. Starting today.

http://www.foodincmovie.com/about-the-issues.php

Click me!

I HEART CHRISTMAS!! THIS YEAR WAS AN AMAZING ONE!

Family Therapy

Priceless moments... Rockband moments in our PJs. I'm reminded when I'm with his family why I love him so much. Why I can't stand to be apart from him. I have him and I have his awesome family. I feel loved and nothing else matters.

White or Black Swan? True Love is her only salvation...

Love it! I want love that is as unexplainable as he is. Yes. I think I have that.

take me to DR, Costa Rica, anywhere but here. A place where the rain is pure

Simple yet True.

No Te Rindas

No te rindas, aún estás a tiempo

De alcanzar y comenzar de nuevo,

Aceptar tus sombras,

Enterrar tus miedos,

Liberar el lastre,

Retomar el vuelo.

No te rindas que la vida es eso,

Continuar el viaje,

Perseguir tus sueños,

Destrabar el tiempo,

Correr los escombros,

Y destapar el cielo.

No te rindas, por favor no cedas,

Aunque el frío queme,

Aunque el miedo muerda,

Aunque el sol se esconda,

Y se calle el viento,

Aún hay fuego en tu alma

Aún hay vida en tus sueños.

Porque la vida es tuya y tuyo también el deseo

Porque lo has querido y porque te quiero

Porque existe el vino y el amor, es cierto.

Porque no hay heridas que no cure el tiempo.

Abrir las puertas,

Quitar los cerrojos,

Abandonar las murallas que te protegieron,

Vivir la vida y aceptar el reto,

Recuperar la risa,

Ensayar un canto,

Bajar la guardia y extender las manos

Desplegar las alas

E intentar de nuevo,

Celebrar la vida y retomar los cielos.

No te rindas, por favor no cedas,

Aunque el frío queme,

Aunque el miedo muerda,

Aunque el sol se ponga y se calle el viento,

Aún hay fuego en tu alma,

Aún hay vida en tus sueños

Porque cada día es un comienzo nuevo,

Porque esta es la hora y el mejor momento.

Porque no estás solo, porque yo te quiero.

Mario Benedetti

O.M.G Paris in the Spring...a girl can dream

Ay Cafesito..... mmmm

We Scrabbled....

He didn't need those wooden tiles, I knew it was already the highest scoring word there was.

oohhhh... I want you. I need you.

Paris... when shall I return?

Andando Descalza

Me pierdo en su fuego,
me encuentro en su mirada,
siento alivio en sus besos.

El logra enamorarme con el suave impulso de su voz
y las cuevas ondas de su pecho
en la cual resonan mis anelos.

Sentirse correspondido
Almas gemelas
Mentes perceptivas
Cuerpos comprensivos, sincronizados

Me he dado cuenta que amarlo es facil.

-M. Peña

He loves my scent....

Porque cada día es un comienzo nuevo. Porque esta es la hora y el mejor momento. Porque no estás solo, porque yo te quiero.

Mario Benedetti

Pretty in Pink

?Alguna vez has sido fiel a tus principios mas que a tu instinto animal?

The Road Not Taken, Robert Frost

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;


Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,


And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.


I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

One of my favorite poems of all time and one of the most misunderstood.

Yes, It can be taken literally as a poem about inspiration and non-conformism. Ironically, this poem can also be translated as one of choice and rationalizing our decisions with pride or regret. Aren't both paths equally as traveled? Could it be that there is no right path? Just the chosen path and the other path. Don't we all second-guess ourselves down the line or at least wonder about what was irrevocably lost? Sigh...

Soy la locura que estremece, soy tu adicción y tu eres mi felicidad, mi calma...

Its nice to be alone with your thoughts sometimes...

My hunny, Me, and Costa Rica... could there be a better picture? Countdown begins...

UNTITLED

I want to tell you a story...about DreamCatchers

In tune...

I believe furiously in us.

No Te Enamores Del Amor

Enamorate de alguien que te ame,
que te espere,
que te comprenda aún en la locura,
de alguien que te ayude,
que te guíe,
que sea tu apoyo,
tu esperanza,
tu todo.


Enamorate de alguien que no te traicione,
que sea fiel,
que sueñe contigo,
que solo piense en ti,
en tu rostro,
en tu delicadeza,
en tu espíritu y no en tu cuerpo ni en tus bienes.


Enamórate de alguien que te espere hasta el final,
de alguien que sea lo que tú no elijas,
lo que no esperes.


Enamórate de alguien que sufra contigo,
que ria junto a ti,
que seque tus lagrimas,
que te abrigue cuando sea necesario,
que se alegre con tus alegrías y que te de fuerzas
después de un fracaso.


Enamorate de alguien que vuelva a tí después de las peleas,
después del desencuentro,
de alguien que camine junto a ti,
que sea un buen compañero,
que respete tus fantasías,
tus ilusiones.


Enamorate de alguien que te ame.
No te enamores del amor.
Enamorate de alguien que este enamorado de tí.

Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, it's at the end of your arm. As you get older, remember you have another hand: The first is to help yourself, the second is to help others.

-Audrey Hepburn

Its my life, I can choose how I make my mistakes...

I wonder all the time what you're doing, who you're with??

Do you think of me intermittently through out your day?

Did you keep my pictures or press that delete button with painless ease?

Did you find someone to replace my side of the bed?

The most eloquent way you lie is with your silence

I prefer it that way

I don't need the truth

I'd rather remember us as we were...

In those white tees, in your boxers, in your bed all day long

Kissing and making love and flowing like you always wanted

Happiness was written on my skin

I was always outside myself with you

I don't wonder...

What if?

You're a memory that I keep bottled

but I remind myself there's a reason you didn't make it to my future.

-M. Peña

Keeping the screws tight...

Love is madness; it’s too easy to lose your mind when you lose your heart.

THE TIME HAS COME! WORLD CUP 2010

I could not be more excited!!! I wait for this like a kid every 4 years!

Definitely partial to Brazil. Its no secret!!

I have my eyes on:

Goalkeeper: Julio Cesar

Defender: Lucio

Mid-fielders: Kaka, Julio Baptista

Forwards: Luis Fabiano, Robinho

KICKOFF: June 11th (South Africa vs. Mexico)

I'd like to think that I'm just "having a moment"

That...

This moment was inevitable

This moment was not my fault

This moment will pass

This moment is a lesson

This moment reminds me what I need to do

to get some reciprocity

This moment will make me cry

This moment will let me walk away

This moment will let me grow

This moment will let me value myself

This moment is a premise to great things

It only takes a moment to realize whats not right

and only a moment for it all to click.

A moment's insight is sometimes worth a life's experience.

-M. Peña

Self Help done my way. I'm enjoying this ;-P

Attraction principle #8- The biggest variable between a bitch and a woman who is too nice is fear. The bitch shows that she's not afraid to be without him.

"One of the things women have tog et out of their mindset is the notion of what a bitch is. A bitch is nice. She's sweet as a Georgia Peach. She smiles and she is feminine. She just doesn't make decisions based on the fear of losing a man. The difference between the bitch and the nice girl is not so much in their personalities or in their demeanor. It has nothing to do with how abrasive a woman is. A bitch is a bitch with her actions, because she isn't willing to give herself up."

Our picture is the best memory

"the best thing about a picture is that it never changes, even when the people in it do."

—
andy warhol

Wise words

In life you need one thing to survive.

Simply the ability to realize shit happens.

You step in it, you accept it, you get the fuck over it,

and you keep walking.

-via eletheowl.tumblr.com

I can't lie, I miss this. I miss him.

Get to know me...

LAYER 1: ON THE OUTSIDE.
Name: Marlene
Date: 5/25/10
Current Location: NYC
Hair Color: Dark Brown
Righty/Lefty: Ambidextrous but mostly righty


LAYER 2: ON THE INSIDE.
Your fear: funeral homes
Your dream of the perfect date: Dinner, wine and a movie @home...its all about the right person not what you're doing with them


LAYER 3: YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW.
Your thoughts first waking up: That's not supposed to hurt, 5 more minutes.
Your best physical feature: I get the most compliments on my hair and my smile
Your bed time: I usually crash by midnight, I'm getting old
Your most missed memory: family vacations to Dominican Republic (just the 4 of us)


LAYER 4: YOUR PICK.
Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi!! its always been you
McDonald’s or Burger King: Mickey D's...its a love affair with those fries
Single or Group Dates: Single
Adidas or Nike: Nike. Just do it.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate (even though I'm dark, I don't like vanilla!)
Cappuccino or Coffee: none of the above. Cafe Bustelo w/leche and cremora


LAYER 5: DO YOU.
Smoke: nope
Cuss: yes
Take showers: hot ones, every night before going to sleep. mmm
Have a crush: hmm...
Like school: sometimes and sometimes I want to shoot myself and ask myself why I'm here. I'm a nerd at heart I guess
Believe in yourself: If you don't, no one else will.
Believe what goes around comes around: Karma is a bitch. You get what you give. True story.
Believe everything happens for a reason: not necessarily. We trick ourselves into believing this to negate the pain. By our nature, we struggle to find meaning and purpose in everything when sometimes there is none.


LAYER 6: IN THE PAST MONTH.
Gone to the mall: hell no
Been on stage: no
Eaten sushi: sushi samba ;-)
Been hurt: yes...damn softball to the shin, damn boys
Dyed your hair: no, reminds me I need a root touch-up


LAYER 7: HAVE YOU EVER.
Played a stripping game: haha. maybe
Kissed the same sex: nope
Gotten beaten up: TMI if I say during sex? and I liked it... lmao
Changed who you were to fit in: never


LAYER 8: GETTING OLD.
Age you’re hoping to be married by: 31?
Number of kids you’re planning on having: 2-3


LAYER 9: IN A GIRL/GUY.
Best eye color: big and brown
hair color: as long as its natural and not dyed
short or long hair: I have a thing for long hair, but clean crew cuts are nice too
Fat or fit: Fit...although I don't mind "fuerte" haha
Looks or personality: personality


LAYER 10: WHAT WERE YOU DOING.
1 MINUTE AGO: drinking malta india
1 HOUR AGO: texting and working
1 WEEK AGO: yoga, studying for a midterm
1 YEAR AGO: had just gotten back from Brazil... best trip ever

LAYER 11: FINISH THE SENTENCE.
I FEEL: overwhelmed
I HATE: people who can't commit to anything
I HIDE: my oreos, my love notes, my credit cards
I NEED: his kiss right now <3
I LOVE: my family

-M. Peña

This is not a love poem

This is a letter I'm too much of a wuss to send.

You're the reason I can write...again

Last night,

As you shed this impossible light

In the obscure and somber isolation of your bed

Billowing kisses over my forehead

Sensibly identifying every crevice of my all too familiar shape

the blades, the dents, my supple ass

which fits right between those strong hands

I know you felt what I felt

your eyes glazed over rooted into mine

It was that ONE kiss though

the one at the foot of your bed

that resonated a million words

Words of love, hate, anxious complexities, fear, sadness,

and disappointment for all things final

A bitter taste of realities too familiar

Would it be too much to ask- Why don't we just start over?

Can I scratch off the expiration date

Swallow the denial

of caring and wishing I didn't

of remembering and wishing I could forget

Dismiss the kisses, the midnight sex, the drinks,

the dances, the talks, the laughs

of all things good overshadowed by the bad

There was no better lie more honest than your truth

You're like no one I've ever met

and I apologize for believing you'd be my lucky #

I apologize for crying because you shredded my hope

and I'm a wreck

so I'll put the hazard signs up

Let's make sure no one else takes a turn

towards my fucked up bone of a soul

I'm desperately trying to let go

I'll leave you with that last kiss

Its easier to let go that way.

In saying nothing, I say it all.

Why does your lazy heart not keep up

with the beats in your kiss?

Maybe you should cut back the social masturbation

And try instead for a more intimate relationship

I promise its amazing to have one with someone other than yourself

And I thought a lot...last night

After a long drive home,

and the sleepless night laid agape on my back

Today, I walk in slow motion

I can only trick myself into believing I can move on for so long

You say I cry wolf, but I'm just trying to protect

my endlessly exposed wounds.

I feel as though they may never heal

with the constant lashing, tossing of false illusions.

Delusions of you and me

The ones stuck at the forefront,

doubled over between my eyes.

Even though I'm not at a loss for words,

I have no clue what to do next.

Let time do its thing...

perhaps I'll even regenerate my heart in the process.

perhaps you'll grow one.

-M. Peña

Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people.

Eleanor Roosevelt (via rorrimehtni)

I hope to one day meet him...

our existence will be pure, timeless

an everlasting feeling of love with all the lines filled in

no cracks for us to ever fall in

...

In the meantime, I'll unravel these thoughts and sip on my coffee.

-M. Peña

sometimes...
we fail at loving ourselves...
sometimes... it’s hard to let ourselves be loved,
or be awake enough to recognize
all of it’s many manifestations.

Sometimes....

Sometimes the WRONG train can take us

to the RIGHT place.

-Paulo Coelho

my convo with a friend today...

Kyle

although i miss the fuck out of your laugh and totally fell in love with that

10:01pm

Marlene

really? do i have a crazy laugh

you're not the first to say that

10:01pm

Kyle

nah

it's not crazy

at all

a laugh is something that helps define you

and yours in uninhibited which is beautiful

not crazy at all

es mi favorita

Where am I?

You'll find me....
In Between
the fibers and the ink stain
the keys and the glare
the verses and the melody
the bridges, the trains, the roads
In Between
A tall glass and a spiked drink
Rock bottom and the high of the sky
my reality and my fantasy
and on lonely nights
between the tangible and intangible
parts of his being
between his lips, his legs, his arms,
his hands, his sheets, his whispers, and his laughs.
Sometimes I find myself in his dreams
and the brighter part of his days
But then, I'm no longer in between.
I'm present in his space.

-M. Peña

a wise proverb

Trust the soul

BEFORE

you trust the body

-DE LA VEGA

Fill in the blank

He won't be as __________ as you.

that is my fear/wish?!

-M. Peña

En mis sueños

Almas volandos

calladas,

somos palomas

en crepúsculo.

Pero estoy sana, no triste

junta a tu silencio,

tu mirada, y tu sonrisa.

Se me estremesia el miedo

y pasión mortal

en las noches

a tu lado, en tu cuello.

-M. Peña

one word....SADE

In that mood....

from Paulo Coelho's blog...

En definitiva, las cicatrices son necesarias cuando luchamos contra el Mal Absoluto, o cuando debemos decir que no a todos aquellos que, a veces con la mejor de las intenciones, intentan estorbar el camino que conduce a nuestros sueños.

I'm unpacking my sardined thoughts in order to make room for sugar coated words and sweetened kisses. lingering tastes of salty-sweetness fill the bed tonight.

-M. Pena

Los Secretos

No son solo partes de celos y angustias

no son solos invisibles misterios

no son solos cucullos en el oido

existen los secretos entre tu y yo, entre cuerpos,

y llenos de besos deramados en voces y sueños

que solo escuchamos tu y yo

el secreto esta medido en lo que siento por ti

el secreto se convierte en recuerdo

tu eres mi secreto <3

-M. Peña

Never learned this in history class....

...and the search continues

-M. Peña

Deep Words inside my head

"I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead; I lift my lids and all is born again"

"EVEN AMIDST FIERCE FLAMES

THE GOLDEN LOTUS CAN BE PLANTED"

-Sylvia Plath

Awake in my sleep

....Because my dreams are bursting at the seams, trying to get to the reality.

-M. Peña

your secret admirer

the echoes of your streets

are gestured in the shadows

reflections of unsweetened kisses

a trail where I want to share my thirst

for you.

-M. Peña

May love be your guide in every moment of your life

and the simple truth is - "Wherever your heart is, there you will find your treasure." me dijo el alquimista

I can't find my heart these days. now what?

-M. Peña

every once in a while

My tongue spits fire and creates

lasting im/de/pressions from

my vulnerable state of abandonment

(apparently we are dispensable perhaps even replaceable)

yet-you drift through life, defying our gravity

...and all the while wilting my eyes

...breaking my nights.

I'd like to one day show something other

than my blistered skin in disguise.

-M. Peña

Porque Aveces

El impulso es increible;
y muy simple para dar explaciones.

Se apago la noche
y se prendio el fuego en medio de la calle.
no se hasta donde llegara.

-M. Peña